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Monthly Archives: October 2011

Bolognese Machiavelli

  1. Arrange to have garlic and onions cast into hot oil.
  2. The carrot and celery you must divide against themselves. Ground beef, too, shall turn upon the burner; crush any coherent resistance with a spoon of wood. Sautee until no hint of blood remains to stain your hands.
  3. Perhaps, in a dark place without witnesses, the tomato shall meet with the knife.
  4. The basil and parsley you may use without consequence. For long minutes, all shall be muddled and roil on the surface of the flame.
  5. If it is most advantageous, store cold for the proper day.

John Belushi

The year was 1961. Outside the famous Grauman’s Theater in Boston, John Belushi was walking home from rehearsal when he ran into an eager young fan. “Mister Belushi!” he cried. “How can I grow up to be famous like you?”

“Well,” said Belushi, and pulled a shiny quarter from behind his ear. “You know what the writing on the back of this says?”

“Gee, I don’t!”

“In God We Trust,” said John Belushi. “If you remember that, you might just make it in show biz.” The boy dried his eyes and nodded with determination.

That young man’s name? Was Babe Ruth.